Last weekend, Mr Fiance and I attended the Cinta Abadi (Art of Marriage) course. Mr made it compulsory for us to go since honestly, i don’t feel like going and burn my 2 days off for the week. (Feeling so tired now while making my way to work)
Overall, i recommend couples to go although its no longer compulsory and majority of the topics were superficially touched, in my view due to time constraint. (I edited here again after a conversation with a BTB 🙊 which i agreed too. I felt marriage course is good but i strongly recommend you choose the right course vendor because like i state it was superficialy touched. Plus it wasnt that islamic involved, but more modernly involved. So make right decisions okay? It was okay to me because i felt more love and bonded with my other half 😂)
Day 1 was boring for me and Mr felt the same too but our neighbours that we sat with made it funnier as day 1 starts to get to an end. The masculine in that group were making jokes and the feminine were just laughing at them. Day 2 was better than day 1. Maybe reasons such as all the couples has already warm-up may be the factor plus the topics covered are more awesome than day 1. After much reflection, i actually learnt few things in my own way.
We did some reflections on the why(s) and the criteria of our life partner. The values we need to build our marriage. We were asked to drew our marriage vision. The marriage vision mind-map, i add things secretly without Mr knowing because i love to imagine and aim high while he focus on just achieveing something within his means. I can’t totally remember the rest except that we are lucky to have someone to talk to us briefly about the financial planning. Resale versus BTO versus SBF BTO. Investments. CPF. There were too many actually. Anything about financial planning for the future, i am all up for it. Maybe because ever since 16 (after O’s) i have been earning myself through part-time job and my parents ceased all allowance since then. Due to that, i realised the importance of savings for the rainy days. Its totally fine to have more but never fine if you have less.
Mr and i agreed to fill up the form to have an appointment arranged with him but Mr decided that he don’t want to meet him since we had our own financial advisor now, who is his close brother. So we decide to give it a miss if he were to arrange for it. I don’t really favour having someone i don’t really know but of course, he is more experienced. To each of his owns. Took down some pointers because i will review my financial goals with Mr soon again to do some adjustment. Learnt a few new things and read up that very night.
After the course, we met up with our friend to seal another investment deal. At the same time, we put across our worries and fears but he talked us through. We had short catch-up session and laughter. Managed to tell him of my next plan(s) that i wish to take up and he take note of it so that our next meet-up he can explained to me and Mr before we decide.
We went our earlier than usual. Dropped by Bugis to get OCK. Arrived in class to realise that we need to change neighbours. Morning gratitude to Mr came unexpected too because whatever that came out was due to me staring at him during the train ride and i was silently saying inner dialogue gratitude. But bam, it happened in class. And i don’t often tell him verbally either.
The topic covered was interesting, especially the financial planning. The game plan was fun though scary. Scary in a way because through mid month, my future husband was left with just $100+ to spend on wants while i held the remaining $300+ in hands for the needs and i saw many other couples having more cash than us in hands makes me nervous. But i told Mr not to worry because our savings is safe. I’ll never forget how Mr was supporting me but i backfire on him when i said ‘asal boleh‘ to him can bake 😂 Member geram je. But yes, he can cook and he can bake for me ☺️ But eventually, we did it! And that game too taught me new things that i didn’t realise. Thankful for it.
Sexuality topic and how to get along with in-laws was fine to me but i feel i need to read up more. But no doubts, i have fears of how his family can accept me and how can i be a good daughter in law. The part on stating strengths of Masculine and what are the improvements made me realised this, ‘my future husband is unique and i should never generalize him like a typical man because some of the improvement qualities he does’t have it at all but its me instead 😂’ When i did the presentation, i wish i could secretly tell him that only i know his strengths and weakness, so this don’t apply to you and i’ll always try my best for us.
So in summary, attend it to increase awareness and be more bonded with your other half. Not to forget create beautiful memories together.
I am planning to do some things for us. Intending to buy empty a4/a3 book to create #sbxsr book with our marriage vision in it and storyline of our every first. Mr planning to do some recording of daily expenditure which i did do a record in an exercise book but it dies off because majority is spend on food so tak kuasa nak record because food is a need. Going to review our financial plans together and compile it as a whole so that we can plan ahead or adjust etc. Should i create a post on my financial habits and plan though? But then again its a sensitive issue to most but i really find this is a major thing and not to forget health coverage.
Alhamdulillah, marriage course down. ROMM booking down. Waiting for my next leave in December! Mother is planning for a short vacation but i think i need to get things done seriously.
While my Mr busy helping out his friend with his wedding proposal, i am strolling home in sadness sebab rindu punya pasal 😂😂😂
Lots of love,
Ms SR ❤️